I stumbled across this wonderful patent for a board game that will help a geek through the many different yet expected dating experiences as they build up the courage to step away from their comics or PCs. I don’t know if the game is in production yet, anyone care to check for it on Amazon or Toys R Us?
The goal of this game is to learn how to date before you strike it out on your own and strike out; it’s billed as “both entertaining and educational” and “provide a means by which the principles of dating, ethics, wisdom and dating with purpose can be taught in a high compressed time frame”.
Why the need to compress the time frame of your education? The patent application implies it’s to help find a compatible spouse. In fact, the first five paragraphs are used to back up the need and difficulty in finding a compatible spouse!
My god, have geeks gotten to the point where we need a board game to learn how to date? Whatever happened to just figuring it out by watching how they do it on TV?
Experiences include:
- dumping your date
- getting dumped yourself
- how to deal with a date whose hands are all over you
- self control when kissing
- and other great scenarios like this one: “Against your wishes, your date keeps seductively talking and looking at you“. I think the problem here is that you are pushing back on the advances, right?
The game includes tokens, a “random number generator” ( a die) and a board. The board has two tracks: “Dating for fun” and “Serious dating” and is shaped like a heart; that’s cute.
“The Pick Up Artist”- My version of how the game should have been designed:
With a few tweaks, I think this game could be turned into something a little more risque and fun, let’s call it ‘The Pick Up Artist’. Perhaps some challenges could be:
- Get to “Third Base” by the second date
- A former boyfriend confronts you two at the movies (Roll for initiative!)
- Choose the best break up line to reduce the penalties when dumping the date (e.g., should you use “it’s not you it’s me”, or “our religions will always make us incompatible”)
- Should you choose the sympathy route when asking her out on a date? (e.g. “I joined the Marines and I’m heading to Iraq next week”)
Ah, now that would be more like it. 
Wouldn’t surprise me if there was already something like the ‘Pick up artist’ out there.
Here’s more from the application -
Patent number: 6896263
Issue date: May 24, 2005
Inventor: Michael Matthews
Abstract
Disclosed is a game for teaching dating skills that includes a first deck containing a plurality of cards, the cards in the first deck having a face containing information representing a character trait which may be valuable when dating, and a second deck containing a plurality of card, the cards in the second deck having a face containing information representing a dating challenge and information representing at least one resolution to the dating challenge. The decks of cards are used in combination with a playing surface displaying at least one track, containing spaces corresponding to both decks of cards.
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